Saturday, January 24, 2009

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

Can I pray for you in any way? Send any prayer requests to faithhopegodlove@aol.com In Christ, Mark

The scriptures. May God bless the reading of His holy word.

Meanwhile, Abner son of Ner, the commander of Saul's army, had taken Ish-Bosheth son of Saul and brought him over to Mahanaim. He made him king over Gilead, Ashuri and Jezreel, and also over Ephraim, Benjamin and all Israel.

Ish-Bosheth son of Saul was forty years old when he became king over Israel, and he reigned two years. The house of Judah, however, followed David. The length of time David was king in Hebron over the house of Judah was seven years and six months.

Abner son of Ner, together with the men of Ish-Bosheth son of Saul, left Mahanaim and went to Gibeon. Joab son of Zeruiah and David's men went out and met them at the pool of Gibeon. One group sat down on one side of the pool and one group on the other side.

Then Abner said to Joab, "Let's have some of the young men get up and fight hand to hand in front of us."

"All right, let them do it," Joab said.

So they stood up and were counted off—twelve men for Benjamin and Ish-Bosheth son of Saul, and twelve for David. Then each man grabbed his opponent by the head and thrust his dagger into his opponent's side, and they fell down together. So that place in Gibeon was called Helkath Hazzurim.

The battle that day was very fierce, and Abner and the men of Israel were defeated by David's men.

The three sons of Zeruiah were there: Joab, Abishai and Asahel. Now Asahel was as fleet-footed as a wild gazelle. He chased Abner, turning neither to the right nor to the left as he pursued him. Abner looked behind him and asked, "Is that you, Asahel?"

"It is," he answered.

Then Abner said to him, "Turn aside to the right or to the left; take on one of the young men and strip him of his weapons." But Asahel would not stop chasing him.

Again Abner warned Asahel, "Stop chasing me! Why should I strike you down? How could I look your brother Joab in the face?"

But Asahel refused to give up the pursuit; so Abner thrust the butt of his spear into Asahel's stomach, and the spear came out through his back. He fell there and died on the spot. And every man stopped when he came to the place where Asahel had fallen and died.

But Joab and Abishai pursued Abner, and as the sun was setting, they came to the hill of Ammah, near Giah on the way to the wasteland of Gibeon. Then the men of Benjamin rallied behind Abner. They formed themselves into a group and took their stand on top of a hill.

Abner called out to Joab, "Must the sword devour forever? Don't you realize that this will end in bitterness? How long before you order your men to stop pursuing their brothers?"

Joab answered, "As surely as God lives, if you had not spoken, the men would have continued the pursuit of their brothers until morning. "

So Joab blew the trumpet, and all the men came to a halt; they no longer pursued Israel, nor did they fight anymore.

All that night Abner and his men marched through the Arabah. They crossed the Jordan, continued through the whole Bithron and came to Mahanaim.

Then Joab returned from pursuing Abner and assembled all his men. Besides Asahel, nineteen of David's men were found missing. But David's men had killed three hundred and sixty Benjamites who were with Abner. They took Asahel and buried him in his father's tomb at Bethlehem. Then Joab and his men marched all night and arrived at Hebron by daybreak.

The war between the house of Saul and the house of David lasted a long time. David grew stronger and stronger, while the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker.

Sons were born to David in Hebron:

His firstborn was Amnon the son of Ahinoam of Jezreel; his second, Kileab the son of Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel; the third, Absalom the son of Maacah daughter of Talmai king of Geshur; the fourth, Adonijah the son of Haggith; the fifth, Shephatiah the son of Abital;
and the sixth, Ithream the son of David's wife Eglah. These were born to David in Hebron.

2 Samuel 2:8-32, 3:1-5

This ends this reading from God's holy word. Thanks be to God.

With David anointed king of Judah and Saul dead, Israel was left without a king, although it was already determined by God that David would become king of all Israel. But for now, that had not taken place.

For we read in Chapter 2 of 2nd Samuel that “Abner…the commander of Saul's army” had appointed “Ish-Bosheth son of Saul” to be king over Gilead, Ashuri and Jezreel, and also over Ephraim, Benjamin and all Israel. In this, we see where all of Saul’s sons were not killed by the Philistines and see where Saul’s army commander also survived the battle.

Abner’s actions resulted in two ruling parties in Israel and laid the foundation for what was to come. For these ruling parties soon became competing parties, seeking to wrestle absolute power, property and authority from the other…and clearly displaying the amount of cost that comes with conflict.

The attempt to determine who would have ultimate power began at “the pool of Gibeon”. There, “Abner…together with the men of Ish-Bosheth” met “Joab…and David's men” with one group (sitting) down on one side of the pool and one group (sitting) on the other side”. Once there, Abner and Joab agree to try and settle the matter through hand-to-hand combat between a small faction of each group.

And so each group stood and “were counted off — twelve men for Benjamin and Ish-Bosheth…and twelve for David. Ironically, the number of men chosen coincided with the number of tribes in Israel. And so the combat began but ended quickly when “each man grabbed his opponent by the head and thrust his dagger into his opponent's side, and they fell down together” All men, twelve from each side, fell dead and so nothing was resolved except for needless killing.

Note that neither Abner or Joab asked God what they should do before they did it. No…they went on their own idea of how to resolve the conflict and the outcome was tragic. So would they learn from that mistake and ask God now? Sadly, no.

For after the twenty-four men fell dead from the hand-to-hand combat, a very fierce battle ensued which resulted in “Abner and the men of Israel” being “defeated by David's men”. Not wishing to die himself, Abner fled the battle scene but he was far from out of danger. For hot in pursuit was Joab’s brother Asahel who was described as being “as fleet-footed as a wild gazelle”. Asahel used his speed to chase Abner, “turning neither to the right nor to the left as he pursued him”.

Abner, seeing Asahel following him, asks him to break off his chase and “turn aside to the right or to the left” to “take on one of the young men”. Abner, not wanting to harm Asahel, tried to get him to go after another of his men…one that Asahel had a better chance of defeating. But Asahel refused to listen and continued the chase.

Scripture tells us that Abner warned Asahel again saying, “Stop chasing me! Why should I strike you down? How could I look your brother Joab in the face?" Clearly, Abner knew he would easily be able to kill Asahel if he had to. Stubborn in his desire to fight Abner, “Asahel refused to give up the pursuit” and it led to his death as Abner turned and “thrust the butt of his spear into Asahel's stomach”. Asahel’s forward momentum was so great that “the spear came out through his back” and “he fell there and died on the spot”.

As the rest of David’s men ran forward and “came to the place where Asahel had fallen and died”, they stopped, not wanting to die as he did. But we read where “Joab and Abishai pursued Abner” obviously wanting to avenge their brother’s death. Would more bloodshed follow as “the sun was setting” and both groups met again and took their stand on “the hill of Ammah, near Giah”? Without a change in attitude from each side, surely more bloodshed and death were imminent.

And change is what we see happen.

Because “Abner called out to Joab” and said, "Must the sword devour forever? Don't you realize that this will end in bitterness? How long before you order your men to stop pursuing their brothers?"

Indeed, Joab’s brother was already dead as well as the twelve men who died in the combat at the pool of Gibeon and nineteen other men of David. The loss was even greater on Abner’s side as “three hundred and sixty Benjamites who were with him died along with the twelve men at Gibeon. With this, Abner’s words were timely and effective.

For Joab answered, "As surely as God lives, if you had not spoken, the men would have continued the pursuit of their brothers until morning.” And with that, “Joab blew the trumpet, and all the men came to a halt; they no longer pursued Israel, nor did they fight anymore”. With a truce made and fighting over, each side returned to their respective homes with Asahel being buried in his father's tomb at Bethlehem as David’s men returned to Hebron.

Unfortunately, this wouldn’t be the last clash between “the house of Saul and the house of David”. Scripture tells us that their war “lasted a long time” with David’s side growing “stronger and stronger” while “the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker”. It would only be a matter of time before David would be where God intended for him to be…king over all of Israel.

Today, scripture underscores the dangerous nature of conflict. And although, we read about war and death on the battlefield as a result of conflict, conflict doesn’t necessarily need to have to be in the context of war and with death as the outcome..

For what about when we get into disputes with others? Can’t these non-lethal conflicts spiral out of control and lead to damaged relationships with other? The answer is obviously yes and maybe you have had the displeasure of being in the midst of one of these conflicts. I know I have.

Disputes, if unchecked, sow seeds of dissent and anger…emotions that suck the very life out of the kind of relationship that God expects us to have with one another. Dissent and anger breed contempt and resentment and hatred…and these emotions, if unchecked, can lead people to enter into war with one another…sometimes with fatal results.

So what are we to do in life when we are faced with conflict? We turn to the One the Father sent to show us how to live…both now and forever. We turn to Jesus.

For Jesus has the answer for conflict as He does in all things and gave us clear guidance as to how we’re expected to deal with potential enemies. Consider this passage:

But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

Luke 6:27-36


The Old Testament way of dealing with enemies was an eye for an eye. You would do unto others as they did unto you or one you loved. This attitude was conflict-driven.

Jesus turned this attitude completely around and centered it on the one thing that defined him more than any other…love.

For we read where Jesus instructs us to love our enemies and do good to those who hate us…to bless those who curse us and pray for those who mistreat us. The world would say this is crazy. And that’s what Jesus wants. To get the world’s attention by the way His people act.

For if we do the same as our enemies, how are we any better or different than they are? This is what Jesus was trying to get across when He said, “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full.” Jesus doesn’t expect is to act as the world acts. He expects us to act as He acted. And when we act as He acted, then and only then will we be able to be merciful as our Father, His Father, is merciful.

Friends, do you have enemies today…someone who you have a feeling of anger or hatred for?

If so, it’s time for conflict resolution and Jesus stands ready to make it happen within you. Amen.

In Christ,

Mark

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